10 Things

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By Vijay Simha

Gandhi Would’ve Done Now

1. CAMP IN DANTEWADA
Elementary. It’s a conflict that is killing the poor.

2. CHANGE THE CONGRESS PRESIDENT
Even giants like Bose, Nehru, Azad and Patel didn’t get more than a year or so.

3. GO ON HUNGER STRIKE AT ATTARI-WAGAH
The border is a line across hearts, Gandhi might have said, not nations. What better way to make this point than to stop eating.

4. OPEN AN ASHRAM FOR ALCOHOLICS 
His eldest son Harilal died as Independent India’s most famous alcoholic. There are many more now.

5. GONE ON A GODHRA MARCH 
Dandi worked. Godhra might have too.

6. MOVED THE CABINET INTO THE VILLAGES
UPA 2 has become too robotic to excite. He would’ve moved them where they should connect, the villages.

7. PUT MANEKA GANDHI OUT OF A JOB
He was a big one for animal welfare. No need for a politician to make her name off it.

8. FORGIVE KASAB
It’s the thing he did well. Shame the perpetrator into making amends. Did it with Suhrawardy in Calcutta, would do with Kasab.

9. WIND UP THE CONGRESS
His last advice to the Congress was to disband the organisation. More reason now to do so.

10. SIMPLY DIE ON BABRI MASJID
Too much for him, that his countrymen should destroy and kill in the name of Ram.

& 10 THINGS HE WOULDN’T

1. Use his picture on currency
2.
 Allow Operation Green Hunt
3.
 Have a holiday on 2 October
4. 
Agree to a nuclear deal
5. Hold CWG 2010
6. Hide from the press. He loved it
7. Name everything after him
8. Allow dynasty in politics
9. Act on stone-pelters in Kashmir. Would’ve have supped with them
10. Allow China a free hand. Would’ve been a match for Mao

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